Overview

Let’s say one of your team has missed the deadline on something important, like a marketing plan they were meant to deliver today, and you find out they’ve been working on other things, and it’s not done. It might not feel quite right, but you shift the deadline and that team member kinda sorta gets away with it. But the day moves fast, and maybe it’s easier to just focus on getting it done now rather than taking the time to have a conversation about accountability. This is the moment where accountability lives or dies.

A lot of managers talk a good game about accountability. But few actually do it consistently. Usually, the root cause of the inconsistency is that managers want to avoid conflict and being seen as the ‘bad guy’. But what happens next when you avoid the accountability conversation is much worse than that conversation ever could be.

Avoiding accountability hurts your team more than the conversation ever will. The longer you let people get away with stuff they shouldn’t, the weaker your leadership is with the rest of the team. You can talk about the importance of quality all you like, but as long as you avoid dealing with underperformers, you’re just not credible, and the mistrust begins because team members watch as their colleagues slack off and get away with it.

Still, it’s hard. No one likes being the one who has to say: “We needed you to do this job, and you didn’t do it.”

It’s one of the fundamentals of management defined in Traction, the book by Gino Wickman that’s at the heart of the Entrepreneur’s Operating System. Gino talks about LMA – Lead, Manage, Accountability. It’s your job to hold people to account for their performance or non-performance. If you don’t, you weaken your culture, and performance surely follows.

In the end, accountability is where the big visions end up. Implementing visions requires accountability for execution of tasks aligned with the vision. And more widely it’s where culture lives or dies: ‘here’s our standards or expectations in terms of behaviour, and here’s where you’ve fallen short’.

Here’s how to embrace accountability conversations, and start making them work for you and your team.

Understanding when leaders avoid accountability

How to shift from reactive to active

Methods for practicing accountability

Turning accountability into coaching

Why don’t we?

Even though we generally understand the concept, accountability is still a big issue because it’s hard. Managers often don’t have time, and they haven’t been taught how. So they end up not doing it well or consistently enough.

So why is it so hard? At best, the conversation is just a bit uncomfortable. When done poorly it risks causing conflict, damaging trust, or you’re seen as the ‘bad guy’. Many managers fear that’s what will happen every time. So they freeze, avoid the conversation, or let the excuses ride. Accountability conversations don’t even get started.

But know this: accountability is a leadership decision. Whether you avoid it or embrace it, it illustrates to your team what your standards really are.

So what should you do? Let’s say someone’s presenting a report, they’ve clearly done zero preparation, and it’s a shambles. The first thing you need to do is pause. Pause so that you can take notice of your reaction in that moment and choose your next step carefully.

We call this pause entering the Active Mindset. It’s the moment you take to connect with what’s really going on rather than just rolling on oblivious. What’s going on inside your head? Are you minimising the issue to avoid conflict? Hoping that no one else noticed? Finding ways to justify it? When you catch yourself reacting like this, pause. Take a breath. Decide to act with intention, not impulse. This shift from reactive to active lets you lead with calmness and clarity.

Why holding people to account feels hard

It helps to understand the psychology of accountability.

Leaders often avoid accountability because they fear conflict and rejection. Our brain, always looking for the path of least resistance, tries to avoid confrontation because it’s hard work. But you don't want to let underperformance or misbehaviour slide, so it creates an internal conflict, which results in stress, which loads up the accountability dilemma even more.

Recognizing these mental blocks is the first step. The second step is to reframe it: accountability isn’t punishment. It’s a coaching moment. It’s about helping people learn how to improve and succeed. It’s about cultivating a growth mindset. It’s where confidence and psychological safety start.

This is part of your job. Own your role as a coach. Discomfort means you’re doing the right thing, and you’re about to help someone on their journey.

Employees who get frequent, clear feedback (including accountability discussions) are more engaged, more productive and generally make a bigger contribution. Accountability done right makes feedback more meaningful.

How to make it easier

But none of that makes it any less hard to have the conversation. We can pretty much all agree on the theory, and maybe we know it already, but you could know all this and still not do the hard work of accountability. That’s because our fears aren’t rational. Accountability conversations often require a level of courage that’s beyond us, which doesn’t get solved by reading an article. The real work comes in the form of turning those conscious thoughts into habits that are learned and reinforced over time.

There’s only one way through those fears: new habits that displace those old habits of thought. The more habitual your behaviour, the less willpower and courage you require.

Get so familiar with these habits that after a while you don’t even have to think about them.

And like most solutions to procrastination and avoidance, it’s all in making the start as easy as possible.

How to do accountability - and more

In our Active Manager Program course on “difficult conversations” we set out a simple, practical approach.

State the facts. “The report was due Friday. It’s not done yet”. Don't go into context or judgement, just the plain facts.
Explain the impact. “This delays the client’s decision and puts the project at risk.” Again, stick to the facts.
State the requirement: “we need to deliver on our commitments on time. If there’s some reason you can’t do that, you need to flag it in advance.” Again, you’re simply stating the expectation in simple, unambiguous terms that no one could argue with.

Technically at this point you’ve done the accountability bit. But if you stop there, you’re failing on the L and M part of LMA: leading and managing.

Managing is about getting the best from people. That means treating them fairly and ensuring they feel heard. Avoid scolding people. Sending people away with a flea in their ear just breeds resentment and disengagement. Be clear about how they’ve failed to meet the standards, then work with them to make it better.

Create space for a two-way conversation. Gather information from their perspective about what went wrong and use what you learn to craft a solution that works for everyone. You’ve clarified how they failed to meet the standards. Now start rebuilding.

It’s another simple practical process. It’s called listening.

Ask for their perspective. “Can you tell me what happened?” Everything makes sense when you have all the information, and everyone deserves an opportunity to explain themselves. In this part of the discussion, stay curious not furious. Focus on solving the problem, not blaming. Understand and acknowledge where you might have contributed to the problem (you probably did). You don’t have to agree with their perspective or let them off the hook. They did fail to meet the deadline. They can’t un-ring that bell.

So add this fourth step to the list from earlier:

Agree on next steps. Make it collaborative and clear. “Let’s set a new deadline. What support do you need to meet it?”

At each step, use your Active Mindset to check in with yourself. Don’t rush it. Are you reacting with frustration or choosing curiosity? Use a coaching mindset. Pause if you feel frustration rising. Remind yourself, “This is about growth, not blame.”

This method keeps conversations clear and productive. It builds trust rather than tearing it down.

Practice makes progress

Holding people accountable is a skill that can be learned. It takes deliberate practice, and we always say that it’s about progress, not perfection.

For example, reflect on your last difficult conversation. What went well? What could you improve? Deliberate practice builds confidence.

Reflection itself is an active management practice. After tough conversations, ask yourself, “Did I react or lead? How could I coach better next time?” Be kind to yourself but also be realistic and be hungry to improve. Thie shift from reactive to active builds your leadership muscle.

And your confidence doesn’t increase simply because you get familiar with the process. Your confidence increases because you step outside your comfort zone to do something that’s unfamiliar and even a bit risky. And each time you do that successfully you grow a little more. Because what you’re really doing is taking on and overcoming your biggest constraint: yourself. Soon you’ll find yourself holding productive conversations naturally and easily and excelling as a leader.

Holding people accountable is one of those skills you get better at when you practice being comfortable with being uncomfortable. It’s the goals and tools and the follow-ups, but it’s also about shifting your mindset into seeking coaching opportunities. Use facts, stay curious, and keep conversations frequent.

Summary

Holding people accountable is one of those skills you get better at when you practice being comfortable with being uncomfortable. It’s the goals and tools and the follow-ups, but it’s also about shifting your mindset into seeking coaching opportunities. Use facts, stay curious, and keep conversations frequent.

But most of all, take yourself on. As Sir Ed Hilary, the first man to ascend Everest, famously said: it’s not the mountain we conquer but ourselves.